Friday, January 1, 2010

I will not read your f*cking script or manuscript... until June

By now, I’m confident most of you have heard about Josh Olsen’s blog in The Village Voice, “I Will Not Read Your F*cking Script”.  While I find his lack of tact or ability to give back distasteful, I’m going to join him in saying “no” to reading your f*cking script (or manuscript)... for the next six months.

I need your help in keeping that promise to myself.  I can’t do this without you.

Here’s the deal: I am a disease-to-please, insane giver.  I didn’t come upon the title of Twitter Pimp Angel by being selfish, you know.  It’s because I promote others, put fellow writers’ needs first, and give of myself until my pimp feet ache that I am in the position of spending hours a day reading and giving feedback to my posse of wonderful and talented writers. 

The reality is, I have a May deadline to submit the script Doug and I are writing to the Sundance Screenwriter’s Lab.  Our adaptation of Doug's Pulitzer-winning Slavery by Another Name has to be my number one priority.  At this juncture, it is essential to my well-being and professional goals to be selfish. 

Sure, being one of twelve scripts selected is a long shot, but if you know me at all, you know odds don’t scare me.  I believe in the impossible.  Danny Brown recently taught me that “IMpossible” should be interpreted as “I’M possible”.   In order for me to reach my goal, I can’t stand in my own way.

Therefore, Doug and I are going for the brass ring.  If we don’t get Willy Wonka’s golden ticket, it won’t be because we didn’t eat every chocolate bar in sight while writing our fingers to the bone.  Submitting a polished, moving script to Sundance is more important to me than a big, feathery pimp fedora.   If you have any doubt how committed I am, please know I have tears in my eyes as I write this.  Not being able to fully support my fellow writers is extremely difficult for me.

So if you love me; if you want to see your pimp succeed, please, I beg you, don’t ask me to read your f*cking script.  Hold on to it, and I promise I will consider reading as many as I can in June.  Above all, know that I do support you; I do love you; I do want you to be the best writer you can possibly be, but I can’t give any more of myself than I’m giving at this moment. 

My brutally honest, raw feedback will be here waiting for you… in June. 

It ain’t easy for a pimp to ask for help, but I’m asking.  Help me.

*I haven't completely gone on the selfish, self-obsessed train ride... I still want to read all of your blogs, so @ me on Twitter with your latest posts.  I'll read, comment, and pimp until my hat falls off.


  1. Do what you gotta do, Jeanne. You can't spear your own brass ring if you're helping everyone else tilt at theirs. You give tons to the writer community. Nobody can fault you for needing to focus on yourself for a while.

  2. Thanks... I'm one of those natural givers so asking for what I want/need doesn't come naturally for me... neither does asking for help. I appreciate your support more than I can say.

  3. Aha yes, time to get on to the Jeanne train, which is an express to exact destination, not a "local" stopping constantly at places you don't want to go.

    Of course you and I have discussed the "giving" ;-)
    Better to be a giver than a narcissistic awipe, but also good to sprinkle in the self absorption in order to Git-R-Done! I'm with you on that. 2010 is all about that for me as well.

    Bravo, get to work. Sundance awaits!

  4. Hey, with all the pimping you've done, you've earned enough karma credit to tell people to go screw. The #pimpUTubeassistant will be ready when your book is done to help pimp you! :) And good luck. Remember the great words from BABYLON 5:

    Interrogator: "But can you win?"
    John Sheridan: "Every time I say 'no.'"

    Samuraiko :)

  5. It's an example of your nature that you feel you have to explain why you need time for yourself! My only question is, when it's finally a film, will it be in 3D?

  6. Good for you Jeanne. Maybe by the time you come back up for air I'll have something to bug you about. BTW - love to have met you.

  7. Tina, I will always be a giver... as will you. Let's remind ourselves, as many times as it takes, to remember we have needs too. xo

    Roger, I'm laughing at your comment "... you feel you have to explain why you need time for yourself." Man, that IS so me. I hate letting people down. Must be being the youngest of four or being born to a woman who gave everything of herself for everyone else. You now all know why I've been in therapy for years... maybe it's working : )

    Yes, Jim, I'm giving you until June to get your ass in gear with something to show me. Put these 6 months to good use.


  8. Samuraiko... I LOVE those quotes! Can't wait for you to youtube our trailer

  9. OMG Jeanne forget about us GET INTO SUNDANCE! Hon, a pimp has gotta be pimped too, and we iz gun do it for choos.

    And anyway, my shrink is always telling me "being selfish is healthy." He's so right - help out the people (or the community) that you love, but don't neglect yourself. If you do, you won't have anymore crunk juice to fuel your pimping.

    So do what you gotta do. We're already sooper grateful for how you've helped us all, and there is no grudge felt now you're taking time to pimp yourself. We are snickering at how wrong some of the pimp usages sound, but we're cheering you on as you've cheered us on.

    Can't wait to see you at Sundance! ^_^

  10. At this juncture, it is essential to my well-being and professional goals to be selfish.

    Wish I'd written that....


  11. @MatchesMalone just sent me this link of Harlan Ellison's reading of a Dr. Seuss-like poem written by Steve Jarrett as a parody on Josh Olson's "I Will Not Read Your F*cking Script" post. It's hysterical:

  12. That's the sweetest, most endearing way I've ever been cussed at. :)

    But more importantly -- Sundance?? Wow. Fantastic goal. Do not pass Go, Do not collect $200, Go Directly to your computer and stay there until we all hear that you've been accepted.

    Keep us posted, All the best, Kristi

  13. Great Blog, Askizzy told me you'd be a good tweet follow and then I saw your blog link!

    Sometimes "selfish" works!

  14. Good for you! Though I gotta say Sundance isn't really the brass ring.

    No the brass ring would be forming your own production company and sending that script to Don Cheadle's manager!